Sunday, February 24, 2008

how to decide things

use silly websites:

Why you should vote for Obama:
via BarackObamaIsYourNewBicycle
Barack Obama warmed up your car for you
Barack Obama laughed at your joke
Barack Obama emailed your dad and told him how great you are
Barack Obama gave you a puppy

Why to not vote for Hillary:
via HilaryIsMomsJeans
Hilary can't stop talking about her cats
Hilary scratched your favorite record
Hilary drank your milkshake, drank it up

Why Chuck Norris is God:
via ChuckNorrisFacts
# When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

# There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

# Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

# Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

# Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

# Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

# There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

# When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

# Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

# Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

# Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

2004 called. They want the Chuck Norris jokes. 2002 is closely guarding their Vin Diesel jokes.